March, one line a day
some journal pages
1 - Surprise dinner guests from Devon! I was so so happy to have the house filled with people laughing and telling stories. My home is happier today than it was two days ago, that’s for sure. Maybe the answer to this house’s negative energy isn’t sage-ing the shit out of it, but simply adding more friends and laughter. Dinner was great. I made a savory french tart with zucchini, a chickpea/orzo salad and a roasted potato salad with fresh herbs. It was a delicious and colourful spread and so easy to throw together. Very pleased.
2 - The sun is shining again! All things are possible. It was a fun, creative day of projects. And then…. L. called to say that she’s pregnant! There was much screaming and laughter and jumping up and down.
3 - Thankful today for friends who call when they are happy, but also when they are sad. Shared some tears, then pulled myself together, put on a fabulous dress and went to J’s Oscar Party.
4 - Great workout with Yasmine this morning, but I was drained the rest of the day. I didn’t even drink last night! I think I need to work on my protein intake.
5 - Made good progress on the recipe collection today, plus took Míša on two walks in the sunshine!
6 - Amazing news! I did a 4 second handstand, three times in a row! I’m so close to achieving my goal of 5 seconds. The sun was shining, so Míša got a super long walk while I returned calls to family and friends.
7 - Met L for lunch at Brothers Marcus at Borough Market. We sat in the sunshine and enjoyed a very good mezze platter and some (okay) rosé wine. After, I wasn’t quite ready to abandon the sun for the tube, so walked along southbank popping in out of various shops looking for nothing in particular but finding: 3 serving spoons for France and 2 new pencils from Muji.
8 - Spent the entire day at The Alternative Book Fair! I went to various talks that were mostly interesting and inspiring. I might’ve fallen asleep in one session, but it was nice to be in the company of so many book lovers. Later - I went to A’s Annual International Women’s Day dinner, which was even better than last year! The laughter, the stories, the food, everything. incredible night.
9 - Woke up with a mind filled with ideas and clutter but couldn’t figure out which was which. Spent an hour brain-dumping into my journal until I made sense of everything. Took a walk and talked to sister, who gave me great advice on menopausal nutrition. For dinner - made the NYT Ricotta Polpette, which was good but would be better with spinach added to the mix.
10 - Fact: if you have zero other responsibilities in your life, you can eat delicious, nutritious, high-protein vegetarian meals that will leave you feeling so satisfied that you won’t crave unhealthy mid-afternoon snacks. Also a fact: It’s very hard to sustain this when you lead a busy life and need to feed other people with their own requirements and preferences.
11 - The London Library was so busy today, I had to hunt for a desk. But I’m so glad I was forced to go searching, because I ended up finding a super cozy spot in the back stacks overlooking St. James’s Square. I fell into the zone and didn’t leave until they came around at closing and nudged me out of my chair.
12 - Both girls have been having hard days, so today I stayed home and focused on helping, comforting and cooking.
13 - Same.
14 - Back to the library. I continue to make solid progress on the recipe collection, but it’s taking FOREVER to finish. It feels like 80% of publishing a book is editing, formatting, proofing and production.
15 - In the evenings, in front of the TV, I’ve been working on a latch hook pillow for S and GOOD GOD it’s taking forever. I work on it every single night and it still feels only half-way done.
16 - It’s Sunday, and I’m feeling righteous because for the first time in my life I prepped some food for the week: marinated tofu, seared tempeh, cooked veggies, raw veggies, even some soup.
17 - Today was one of those days were I did everything I was supposed to do and was bored out of my mind.
18 - E and I took a field trip to Salisbury! Which as it turns out is not the birthplace of the Salisbury Steak, but a bucolic little city with rivers and bunnies and a cloister and a cathedral.
19 - Today I made a list of all the things that I want to do and/or feel like I should do and then did none of them.
20 - Today the sun was downright hot and I had no choice but to drop everything and take a field trip to Kew Gardens. It’s only two tube stops away - I can’t believe I’d never been before today! It’s huge! And gorgeous! I tried not to notice that I was the only person there under 65.
21 - Another great day at The London Library. On my lunch break, I picked up Pret and ate it in St James’s Square. Then Sophia called and I walked around in circles talking with her for an hour, before going back inside the library. By the time I got home I was so tired and so hungry that I broke my health kick and ordered in Pizza and an ice-cold bottle of Chablis. No regrets.
22 - There was a dramatic thunderstorm today, which I loved. I mean, if you’re going to rain, do it like you mean it. Drizzling all day for the same result is just depressing.
23 - THANK GOD I finally finished the damn pillow.
24 - I accomplished so much today! Planned and booked travel, took care of a million admin tasks, worked on the house and laundry, talked to family and friends on the phone, etc. I don’t understand how I did all that in one day. Some days - given the same amount of hours - I do basically nothing.
25 - Went all the way to east London for a Women’s Prize event at Shoreditch House which was so hip and cool I couldn’t hear a thing or read the menu. There were four of us in attendance: 1) an Author with a PhD in Theoretical Physics, 2) an Author and Clinical Psychologist and 3) an Award-winning Author and Filmmaker and 4) me. I was way out of my league.
26 - Today I went on a Walking History Tour of Bloomsbury. This little field trip way exceeded my expectations! It was informative, entertaining and inspiring! It was like time travelling through literary London. Highly Recommend!
27 - The day before travel is always busy and exciting! Tomorrow morning, we’re taking the train to Paris to meet up with S and H. I’ve made dinner reservations for each night and had ChatGPT prepare an Art Walk through the 4th and 11th. Other than that - free time to wander. Not bringing my computer!
28 - Slept on the train thanks to Stugeron, and arrived into Paris where it was properly raining. I chose to ignore this fact and focused on how utterly lovely Paris is. We all met up for dinner at Tekes in the 2nd and WOW WOW WOW. Best meal I’ve had in a very long time. Plus gorgeous atmosphere and terrific service. This is 100% going to the top of my Paris list. After dinner, we all went to the cabaret at Paradise Latin which was… entertaining? I guess?
29 - Sunny! We walked all over the Marais, popping into every art gallery and exhibition we saw. Had lunch at Mao Dumpling which was OUTSTANDING. Dinner was at Tigermylk and supremely disappointing, but at least we had room for dessert. We walked to the Latin Quarter and had crepes at H’s favourite place: Crepes Suzette. D and I went home - the kids went out and got back around 5am.
30 - The kids studied in a cafe. D and I went to Memorial de la Shoah, then Lunch at Les Philosophes - always a winner! I had the vegetarian lasagna and the tart tartin - both were TOP NOTCH. We sat next to an older couple who are regulars. They live in the Marais, eat once a day at Les Philosophes and spend the rest of their day swimming, reading, napping or going to cultural events around the city. I mean really, they have retirement figured out.
31 - It’s to be sunny all week and thank God for it! Today I had the energy and focus to make good progress on all my projects: I scheduled a call with E to plan our France trip. I caught up on my journaling. I updated my Paris list on the blog. I ordered a few things for my new threading project. And I made excellent progress on my recipe collection. I should be able to print a draft for edits by Wednesday!
February, one line a day
asemic writing
1 - It’s finally not January. Found a new yoga studio that doesn’t suck.
2 - I tortured myself all day, and then published a substack that maybe 10 people will read. Not enjoying this.
3 - Boring day.
4 - Boring day. approaching sad.
5. Boring day. Sad.
6. Went to The London Library for a literary event celebrating the legacy of Carmen Callil and Rachel Cooke, the author of The Virago Book of Friendship.
7. Went to a workshop called Shadow Work for Creatives in the basement of the Atlantis Bookshop, the oldest occult bookshop in London. My tarot spread was ‘juicy’ but I still haven’t figured out what that means.
8 - Woke up with a terrible headache. Went to yoga because I thought it would help. Instead, I paid £18 to sit in child’s pose for 55 minutes. Slept the rest of the day.
9 - Saw The Brutalist with B. Still no sunshine. And also, it’s still February.
10 - S was home on study leave so took her to Megans for brunch. Spent the rest of the day doing all the things on my list. By 7pm, I had run out of things to do. Very nearly opened a bottle of wine and turned on the TV. Instead, took the dog for a walk in the rain. I walked 17K steps and regretted most of them.
11 - Made good healthy choices all day to no avail. M says everyone is struggling this winter. She said there is heaviness in the air. We haven’t seen more than 5 minutes of sunshine since October. Politics and war and the stress of trying to make meaning out of your life when the world around you is indifferent. It doesn’t matter. What matters? Does anything matter?
12 - Finally a good day. Met a friend for dinner who is a no bullshit kind of friend. Talked real and true.
13 - Went to The London Library for an Emerging Writers Event. Wasn’t in the mood to go, but glad I did! Heard some fantastic readings and got inspired to maybe someday write again. Maybe.
14 - Valentines Day. I did yoga and ate a protein bar and drank a glass of wine while watching the worst romcom ever produced for television. Later, I walked to Bailey and Sage to get some things for dinner: fresh pasta and sauce, some risotto, a baguette, a few cheeses, and a bottle of merlot. We ate around the kitchen counter because the kids were working on a puzzle in the dining room. Later the foxes were screeching for each other and Míša was distressed.
15 - What is happening when you are bored: Your family is safe and healthy. You are not in financial crisis or in a mental health crisis. You are just bored.
16 - Started planning our trip to India! I think we’ll do 4-5 days in Karala (wedding) before heading north to Dehli, Agra and Jaipur. I have to go shopping for Indian wedding clothes!
17 - Travelling tomorrow, so today was errands, etc. Went to The London Library but found it impossible to be productive, so browsed the back stacks instead.
18 - Flight from Heathrow to Marrakech, Morocco. We got lucky with passport control and were in a taxi within 90 minutes of landing. The hotel is nice - a few heated pools, several restaurants, a nice spa, etc. When we arrived they served us Sweet Mint Tea and I forgot how delicious and refreshing it was! Ate a late dinner at the French restaurant on site and went straight to bed.
19 - Took a long walk through the medina and markets. What a chaotic jumble of streets, each stall overflowing with goods for sale. Sensory overload! Later, B and I got a hammam scrub at the spa which B thought was a bit too harsh and I though was way to soft. Breakfast and Lunch at the hotel. Dinner - we walked to a place called La Maison de Arab which was just okay, but a nice atmosphere and live music.
20 - Proper vacation day. Spent the whole day reading and napping beside the pool. The most exciting part of the day was the death-defying tuktuk ride to/from the evening restaurant.
21 - Another long day at the pool. B and I did a little sight-seeing and shopping. After dinner (Indian, at the hotel), we all three went to the night market at Jemaa el-Finaa - music, dancing and drumming, plus vendors selling everything you could possibly imagine and then some. Snake charmers and monkey trainers too.
22 - Travel day back to London. Left the sunshine for grey skies and drizzle. Our bags did not make it and we must return to the airport tomorrow to collect them.
23 - Got bags. Did laundry.
24 - Back to rainy, grey life in London. Cheered myself up with a little retail therapy: got some leggings, 2 new sports bras and 2 new tank tops. I’ve been training 2 times per week for several months now and this is my reward!
25 - I think I’ll curate a recipe collection and have it printed. Should be a quick and easy project.
26 - Took a free one-hour class online about cookbook publishing. It was worth every penny. Why do I look elsewhere for what I already know?
27 - Went to a literary event at The London Library called Murder in the Library: The Golden Age of Crime Fiction. Super fun! Think: readers who love Murder She Wrote.
28 - Surprise visit from BL - we had drinks at home and then went out to dinner at the Chiswick Fire Station. Even S came! Lots of laughs and a few too many cocktails.
January, one line a day
Left Hand 3 by Shane Drinkwater
1 - Road my bike all the way around Lake Annecy. I’m so proud of myself! 38 km in 2 hours 11 minutes.
2 - Super cloudy, couldn’t see the lake. Sad. Went to the Chateau Museum in Annecy, it was just meh.
3 - Hiked Roc de Chère, found the sun and it was glorious. Raclette for dinner!
4 - Prepared the house for departure/renters. Can’t do anything about the butter stain Míša created in the living room. Bad dog.
5 - Drove to Gif-sur-Yvette to collect S & H. Got a tour of campus and had Pizza for dinner.
6 - S & I drove from Paris to London and listened to Bob Dylan and Joan Baez most of the way. Gross fast food, until we got home and ordered Pho from deliveroo.
7 - Catch up day - unpacking, laundry, groceries, dealing with the admin of life. Training - set a goal to do a 5 seconds free-standing handstand.
8 - Went to the Chiswick Public Library to work and was underwhelmed. Lots of homeless people (I think we’re supposed to call them rough sleepers now? Which sounds worse to me?) and teenagers who are sneaking vapes and snogs and crisps. There’s only one bathroom, which has a long line, requires a key and is freezing cold and malodurous. this is not going to work.
9 - Impromptu dinner part with A and her girls! Made the creamy adobo salad with bbq tofu. plus really good bread and butter.
10 - S & I went to see the matinee performance of Mousetrap! super fun. dinner - braised coconut spinach with chickpeas.
11 - S’s birthday! She had an existential crisis. Dinner at Din Tai Fung, which is now 100% over-rated in my opinion. Good cocktails though. Then saw Dr Strangelove in the West End staring Steve Coogan - which was better than expected.
12 - Brunch with V&Y at Chiswick Fire Station to discuss NYU. Finally signed up for Goodreads so i can track my reading this year.
13 - Went to a Subatack Writers Group in Hammersmith - and yeah, nice group of people, supportive network, etc…
14 - Went to see the new Lightroom Exhibit: Vogue | Inventing the Runway. Beautiful!
15 -Blood tests came back - hormones out of whack. Shocker.
16 - Apparently I’m to be eating LOADS more protein than I’ve been getting. I mean seriously, when did eating become such laborious thought experiment. I have to learn how to count grams of protein and aim for 30g per meal - and don’t forget the fruits and veg! And fiber! And water! So fucking boring and exhausting. To determine how much protein you should be eating, you basically have to figure out how many grams of protein you can consume without killing yourself and subtract ten. That’s your number. It’s virtually impossible. If all I did was count fruits, vegs, ounces of water and grams of protein I’d be busy all day. How dull.
17 - Family dinner at DGrande - two pitchers of margaritas and a giant bowl of queso. No idea how much protein. Then the Bob Dylan movie, A Great Unknown, which was fine I guess. I liked the music and the era.
18 - Inspired by Madge Gill and Myinerest - I wrote words /scribbled furiously / channeled gibberish onto a page and it was cathartic.
19 - Drove S to Gatwick and spent the rest of the day reading on the couch and feeling sorry for myself for being so boring and lazy.
20 - Splurged. or rather Invested in my happiness. I joined The London Library (TLL). It is my favourite place in London.
21 - Women’s Prize meet-up at The Ivy Club for Writers/Patrons. It was the most fun I’ve had in a very long while! Interesting, smart and kind women.
22 - great food day. bfast: protein smoothie. lunch: took my lunch to TLL (haloumi sandwhich with spinache and tomatoes + apples and peanut butter) dinner: planthood terriyaki tofu rice bowl with broccoli and purple pickled cabbage.
23 - Managed a 2.5 second handstand with good form. getting stronger. Later had accupuncture with Maureen and she “cleared my kidneys” which is related to hormone levels, energy, edrive, etc… i think? i doon’t know exactly, but felt better afterwards.
24 - J’s bday lunch! Great friends, not a great restaurant. The food was just average and the place was so loud we couldn’t hear each other.
25 - Quiet and sad today. not sure why. just feeling blah.
26 - Did everything I was supposed to do today. Still feeling blah.
27 - I spend the whole day in the library. B took Mìša to work and she pooped in the middle of the common room.
28 - Decided to let go of the memoir I’ve been working on for three years. It’s time to move on.
29 - Got an official induction tour of the TLL today. The librarian thought i was famous and i couldn’t talk her out of it. Then went w/B to see Johnny Flower play with Lady Blackbird at The Palladium. Johnny left tickets for us, so I said, we should probably stay behind after the show to thank you. We agreed to make it quick, because we were both exhausted and it was already past our bedtime. Instead, when Johnny saw us she said MUCHAS! WHERE WE GOIN?! We ended up closing down the tequila bar across the street from the venue.
30 - Tried to make healthy choices: ate well, exercised and took a nap. But I still feel sad and demoralized. If I’m not working on a book or a project, what am i doing? Besides filling my days and writing about them in my journal?
31 - Spent the entire day journaling. Then went to M&H’s house for a dinner party and we played games and i laughed so hard mascara ran down my cheeks.
